Stagnant

Well...it's Monday again and here I sit! I'm the same weight today as I was a month ago! And using the same excuses--it's too hot to exercise and too difficult to eat right without a real frig.

I have been somewhat contemplative lately. While I haven't figured out how to get past them, I have realized some of the things that trigger my eating. "Finding Sarah" and "Why Not?" (Shania Twain's story) have helped me to consider my childhood and the choices I made then compared to young adulthood and the poor choices I made then. I find it easy to ignore the poor choices I make now! (LOL) But the truth is that I am still eating to please my taste buds!

I can't blame my weight and lack of exercise on anyone but me. My problem back then was just not thinking. It never occurred to me that I needed to eat with the purpose of feeding my BODY. Exercise was not what it is today--there were no gyms, no fitness centers. At least, not where I lived.

Each time I have put my mind to it, committed it to God and worked at it (probably 10 times in the past 35 years) I have been able to lose weight--10, 15, as much as 30 pounds--but as soon as I start to look and feel good, the bad eating starts again and the weight comes back.

So, right now, my yo-yo is stuck in the up position! I know I need to get down (weight-wise) but history tells me I'm going to be back up here before too long anyway--so why leave? :)

Sorry--this is not very entertaining. What I face is a mental block and all my contemplation hasn't helped me past it. I suppose I need a Niki sign to wake up to every morning--JUST DO IT! In the meantime, I will try again today to make wise choices in what I eat and try to motivate myself to get out and walk. Here's hoping...

Pain hurts!

There is a reason they call it a WORK-out! Not only does it take effort to do, it takes WORK to even get started! And when I hurt, it takes even more effort. I have to exercise my mind--convincing myself that I will feel better after.

Today, though I was hurting, I walked. I was slow and I only walked a little over a mile, BUT I don't feel better. I DO feel a little smarter.

In considering pain, I see three types--1) the pain felt when working, 2) the pain felt with a physical problem, and 3) the pain felt psychologically.

The pain felt when working-out is about gain--about being stronger tomorrow than today. Our muscles need to be used in order to sustain us. The pain of sore muscles is the 'good' pain of growth.

The pain felt with a physical problem is an alarm that something is not right. That's the pain I am feeling today. Something is not right with my neck. I keep hoping and praying that it will straighten itself out, but it may be time to check with a doc.

The pain felt psychologically can stem from physical pain or it can be caused by emotions. It is too complex an idea for me! I can't get my head around all the ramifications.

What I do know is that I would rather have the growth-pain than the other two. But, usually, if you have one or both of the first two, you have the third also. Depression, anger and fear are all intertwined with physical pain.

And pain hurts! But there is a "balm in Gilead" (Jeremiah 8:22) whereby the pain can be soothed.

Lately, I've been walking 30-40 minutes and then spend hours seeking the "balm" and soaking in it.

May the Lord deal with your pain (and mine) according to His will--using it to accomplish His desires. Amen.

Woo--whoo!! The doc's scale said I've lost 5 pounds! That gives me the incentive to do at least one more 2-mile walk!

My dad used to say that his get-up-and-go had got up and went. That's how I'm feeling lately. Seems like about the time I turned 61, I lost my zip! If I exercise in the morning, I feel better all day and usually get more done. But lately, I'm having trouble making myself exercise every morning. I'm remembering a sign I once had--"Lord, give me a push!"--I need that sign right above my bed!! LOL

I also need to get a grip on why I sabotage myself every evening. I am strong (eating correctly) until about 7 or 8 and then I look for (and usually find!) something sweet. That's when I'm thankful the frig doesn't work--no ice cream!

Plan for today:

2 mile walk

toast

cereal bar

turkey sandwich

fajitas (no rice or beans)

In proofreading, I noticed how much bread I will be eating today. I need to find a farmers' market and get some veggies and fruit! "Man cannot live by bread alone..." A gold star to anyone that can finish that quote--and give the reference!

Let's get out there and MOVE, people!

Does this count?

No 2-mile walks, no exercises for 2 days now--but I feel like I'm running a marathon! Keeping up with my grandsons is an all-day workout! And I love it. It has been a whirlwind of restaurants, swimming, hot dogs, bike-riding, funnel cakes and fireworks.

I don't have any idea how many calories I've taken in (too many) but I'm burning them off in kissing and hugging. Of course, I have to catch them to do that, because they don't stand still for long!

Eating plan for today:

toast & banana

grilled cheese sandwich

spaghetti & meat sauce

watermelon--hey!! It's the Fourth of July-gotta have a watermelon-eating contest!

I'll get back to 'formal' exercise in a day or so as soon as I get the s'mores marshmallow stuff out of my hair!!